Friday 28 July 2023

The Inevitable Clash Of Church Tech And Climate Science.

A joke we ought to take a little more seriously.

There's a single-panel cartoon making the theological Twitter rounds, (or X as it were now I guess) that warrants a bit more thought than most Saturday morning paper comics, that no one in my demographic actually reads. Mostly because we have Reddit and Substack now.

Essentially, it points out the very real and very timely correlation, that at one point the false gods of the world demanded human lives for apparent control over the weather. Be it good weather for crops or reliable weather for campaigns, deities of all sorts were on the same page and demanded human death and loss of life and human florishing for the alleged control of the climate. Thankfully the Bible has something to say about demands from anything claiming to be a god, that isn't nailed to a cross on our behalf.


"But I say, that the things which the Gentiles sacrifice, they sacrifice to devils, and not to God: and I would not that ye should have fellowship with devils."

1 Corinthians 10:20 King James Version


I want to point out that it's not that there is an obvious hallmark of demonic activity in the climate science community. It's just that the only other group that has ever sought to control something as massive and complicated as the climate, or weather, has been demons masquerading as gods. Our infallible collection of holy texts tells us so. You know, the Bible. If you don't believe the Bible to be that kind of infallible, then I can't fathom a reason for you to worry about the demons mentioned above, though I do wonder how you reconcile the necessary mastery of the weather that our authorities need to have, to insist that it's their tax-funded programs, that will reverse what we have thus far ignorantly caused, so far as climate change goes. 

This is another great example of the concept of consilience. A word that I find I'm using and finding uses for, far too often for it to be mere coincidence instead. 

What we learned during the last phone-enabled human tracking experience.

Where does this connect with Church Tech exactly? Through the wifi and 5G data plans of course. Something we accepted via ignorance or attrition the last time this kind of control was assumed to be possible by our authorities. only instead of taxing us for carbon they just leveraged the tax of our descendants for relief programs, by borrowing against the national debt. A few years back our smartphones were used to make sure something infinitesimally smaller than the earth's climate was being managed. A virus. By some of the most authoritarian means and measures seen to date. You couldn't get toilet paper without the proper paperwork in hand but since another part of this climate change Behemoth is "going paperless", guess where that paperwork was kept. 

On our phones. 

Those same phones gave the authorities all they needed to insist on how our churches opened and closed because through them the barely supported idea of online church, was at the very least, a possibility. It became an, if not the, argument against those with proper liturgies and doctrine to close their door and limit their numbers at the demand of the authorities. I also became a whip from those that did light the incense to Caesar to urge their Civily disobedient brethren to comply via Romans chapter 13. 

"You can go to church online!" was the argument. But in fact, no arguing or other theological debate was ever done to establish if we could do so. It just looked like we could go to church online so we all agreed, in ignorance or attrition. Without the internet, or as most experience their use of the internet, the smartphone, the online church is not a possibility. We would not have accepted the terms of years without regular gatherings for church, if our means of communication were bound to paper, ink, and the postal service. But since it was convenient, we took 4K streamed services to the chin and said, thank you to the small g deity that gave it to us, though it likely wasn't the one we claimed to worship.

Those phones will be the only feasible way for any organization, government otherwise, to feign an attempt at controlling the weather. Because it's through those phones that they will establish control over the populace instead. The same way they did before. Only instead of an invisible bug, we will have a super visible climate that in fact is always changing in the first place.

Valid reasons to distrust pagans with white clothing.

You'll notice that the term I've used to describe the next crisis de jour isn't the more familiar Global Warming. Some time in the familiar past that term was ditched, likely when the icecaps did not in fact flood the earth like Al Gore Promised or when the polar bear population grew instead of shrank. I could give you a list of internet-based research to show my position, but it won't matter, because we have officially got to the part of the story where you think I'm a conspiracy theorist. Not just a guy who knows Baal worship when I see it. Instead, I'm going to give you a quick Twitter (Or X now I guess) thread to read to show you how climate change is not (at least possibly) what it seems to be. 


It's 15 tweets long and is one of the best explanations as to what's going on with the weird pivot to climate science mania, we are seeing this close to the end of a global pandemic, that isn't technically over yet. The best parts, and what I'll build my case on are tweets 5 through 8.

They show in essence that you can, in fact, say truthful things for dishonest reasons. If only we had a biblical example for that kind of behaviour as well.


"Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made." 

Genesis 3:1 King James Version

"And saith unto him, If thou be the Son of God, cast thyself down: for it is written, He shall give his angels charge concerning thee: and in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone."

Matthew 4:6 King James Version 

"For such are false apostles, deceitful workers, transforming themselves into the apostles of Christ.
And no marvel; for Satan himself is transformed into an angel of light. Therefore it is no great thing if his ministers also be transformed as the ministers of righteousness; whose end shall be according to their works."

2 Corinthians 11:13-15 King James Version"


If you are paying attention we now have two different kinds of things lined up like they were drawn on both sides of a ruler. Demon-led cults with scientists wanting to control the weather, and people saying one thing but loading the words with ill intent towards mankind for another. They make a very grim matched set if they do in fact go hand in raise worshipful hand, together.

So far I only have two nickels for every time I noticed something fishy, how many coins are going to be in this tribute fish when I finally fetch it for Jesus. And will we have saved the whales by then?

The necessity of a smartphone culture for @Christianswhocusssometimes and online pastors.

Because the climate lockdowns will need the smartphones of the faithful to be inseparable from their hands and foreheads (looking at you Vision Pro types even more closely), It's far past time to start looking at how these technologies are affecting the church. Not just in the kind and quality of the wool pulled over our eyes, but in the kind of wool that belongs to sheep, not goats, regardless of how cashmere the texture of the wool might be. 

We do not have a broad and widely accepted theology of the internet but those who would close the church's doors do. And they're not Christians. We use it for utility and for entertainment and blur that line like it's the word Husband in 1 Timothy 3:2. We have Instagram accounts of sneakers and brethren who cuss sometimes, of every and any sort of niche to derive an audience from. Twitter accounts so you can fight from every corner of the theological ring, and still have backup, and enough pastors on Gab and Truth Social to make David French's fingers sore on any given Saturday night. 

All of this and more is simply there. Using the same tools of data collection big tech hoards while reaping none of the data collected. This online world of the Christian faith only exists because Christians think and believe, and as such practice, that you can have your faith online. Blissfully unaware of what that entails when other faiths show up to practice their worship too. 

The small g-gods of the climate change ideology are worshiping at the same high places we've flocked to in this online landscape. So, when push comes to shove the church will be asked to change so the climate doesn't. Even if the climate isn't changing just like the weather that never obeyed Baal but came to heel at Jesus beckoning. Their followers are willing to superglue their hands to the pavement and destroy priceless artwork for their cause. What are ours known for doing in the face of a similar if not worse existential crisis? Someone check in with Jmac and Coates. We may need a refresher.

The glut of data we are giving the scientists now, that we will be unable to un-give them later.

On one hand, we are feeding an information-consuming state with all the information it needs to warrant a public shutdown of modern evangelical churches. Especially the mega-church model. When carbon trackers register 1000 cars all pulling up to one of the largest air-conditioned buildings in the city, will we be as exempt from the rolling blackouts as our tax status says? We don't bring in tax dollars like professional sports. Or Walmart. We actually take money back from the government because of our tax receipts. And they won't forget that when it comes time to offer grants to the altar of peer review, Did we have the requisite reasoning to say the church was essential when we agreed in 96% unity, (according to Barna) that the church can simply meet online? Even when it can't? will 96% of us be okay with foregoing an in-person gathering for the sake of Mother Earth?

Or maybe we need something meatier for the sacrifice on our side. 

Does an earth that is destined for fire and renewal need to be saved from change? Or by Jesus?

What to do when the authorities shut your church down for being north of net zero.

Quite simple really. 

Stay open this time. 

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